RESUME
George W. Bush
The White House,
1600 Pennsylvania Avenue
Washington, DC, USA
EDUCATION AND EXPERIENCE:
LAW ENFORCEMENT:
I was arrested in Kennebunkport, Maine, in 1976 for
driving under the influence of alcohol. I pled guilty,
paid a fine, and had my driver's license suspended for
30 days. My Texas driving record has been "lost" and
is not available.
MILITARY:
I joined the Texas Air National Guard and went AWOL.
I refused to take a drug test or answer any questions
about my drug use. By joining the Texas Air National
Guard, I was able to avoid combat duty in Vietnam.
COLLEGE:
I graduated from Yale University with a low C average.
I was a cheerleader.
PAST WORK EXPERIENCE:
I ran for U.S. Congress and lost.
I began my career in the oil business in Midland,
Texas, in 1975. I bought an oil company, but couldn't
find any oil in Texas, during an oil boom. The company
went bankrupt shortly after I sold all my stock.
I bought the Texas Rangers baseball team in a
sweetheart deal that took land using taxpayer money.
With the help of my father and our right-wing friends
in the oil industry (including Enron CEO Ken Lay), I
was elected governor of Texas.
ACCOMPLISHMENTS AS GOVERNOR OF TEXAS:
I changed Texas pollution laws to favor power and oil
companies, making Texas the most polluted state in the
Union. [We're #1!]
During my tenure, Houston replaced Los Angeles as the
most smog-ridden city in America.
[We love bein' #1!]
I cut taxes and bankrupted the Texas treasury to the
tune of billions in borrowed money.
I set the record for the most executions by any
governor in American history.
With the help of my brother, the governor of Florida,
and my father's appointments to the Supreme Court, I
became President after losing by over 500,000 votes.
ACCOMPLISHMENTS AS PRESIDENT:
I am the first President in U.S. history to enter
office with a criminal record.
I invaded and occupied two countries at a continuing
cost of over one billion dollars per week.
I spent the largest U.S. surplus in history and effectively
bankrupted the U.S. Treasury.
I shattered the record for the largest annual deficit
in U.S. history.
I set an economic record for most private bankruptcies
filed in any 12-month period.
I set the all-time record for most foreclosures in a
12-month period.
I set the all-time record for the biggest drop in the
history of the U.S. stock market.
In my first year in office, over 2 million Americans
lost their jobs.
I'm proud that the members of my cabinet are the
richest of any administration in U.S. history. My
"poorest millionaire," Condoleeza Rice, has a Chevron
oil tanker named after her.
I set the record for most campaign fund-raising trips
by a U.S. President.
I am the all-time U.S. and world record-holder for
receiving the most corporate campaign donations.
[#1!]
My largest lifetime campaign contributor, and one of
my best friends, Kenneth Lay, presided over the
largest corporate bankruptcy fraud in U.S. History,
Enron.
[Kenny-boy, too, loves bein' #1!]
My political party used Enron private jets and
corporate attorneys to assure my success with the U.S.
Supreme Court during my election decision.
I have protected my friends at Enron and Halliburton
against investigation or prosecution. More time and
money was spent investigating the Monica Lewinsky
affair than has been spent investigating one of the
biggest corporate rip-offs in history.
I presided over the biggest energy crisis in U.S.
history and refused to intervene when corruption
involving the oil industry was revealed.
I presided over the highest gasoline prices in U.S.
history.
I changed the U.S. policy to allow convicted criminals
to be awarded government contracts.
I appointed more convicted criminals to administration
than any President in U.S. history.
I retained Richard Clarke, who nobly served his country
for 30 years,
thru several previous administrations, as anti-terrorism czar, where
I
ignored his advice. I showed the foresight to demote his position
from
cabinet-level to mid-staff, & the prescience to attack him as a
job-with-Kerry-seeking, book-promoting, disgruntled promotion-seeking,
former employee just after his book, 'Against All Enemies', was
published, but before he trestified at that pesky 9//11 Congressional
Hearing.
I created the Ministry of Homeland Security, the largest
bureaucracy in the history of the United States government.
I've broken more international treaties than any
President in U.S. history.
I am the first President in U.S. history to have the
United Nations remove the U.S. from the Human Rights
Commission.
I withdrew the U.S. from the World Court of Law.
I refused to allow inspectors access to U.S.
"prisoners of war" detainees and thereby have refused
to abide by the Geneva Convention.
I am the first President in history to refuse United Nations
election inspectors (during the 2002 U.S. 'Midterm' election).
I set the record for least number of press conferences
of any President since the advent of television. I set
the all-time record for most days on vacation in any
one-year period. After taking off the entire month of
August, I presided over the worst security failure in
U.S. history.
I garnered the most sympathy for the U.S. after the
World Trade Center attacks, and less than a year later
made the U.S. the most hated country in the world; the
largest failure of diplomacy in world history.
I have set the all-time record for most people
worldwide to simultaneously protest me in public
venues (15 million people), shattering the record for
protest against any person in the history of mankind.
[#1!]
I am the first President in U.S. history to order an
unprovoked, pre-emptive attack and the military
occupation of a sovereign nation. I did so against the
will of the majority of U.S. citizens, the United Nations,
and the world community.
I have cut health care benefits for war veterans and
support a cut in duty benefits for active duty troops
and their families -- in war time!
In my State of the Union Address, I lied about our
reasons for attacking Iraq.
I then blamed the lies on our British friends.
I am the first President in history to have a majority
of Europeans (71%) view my presidency as the biggest
threat to world peace and security.
I am supporting development of a nuclear "Tactical
Bunker Buster," a WMD.
RECORDS AND REFERENCES:
All records of my tenure as governor of Texas are now
in
my father's library, sealed and unavailable for public
view.
All records of SEC investigations into my insider
trading and my bankrupt companies are sealed in
secrecy and unavailable for public view.
All records or minutes from meetings that I, or my
Vice-President, attended regarding public energy
policy are sealed in secrecy and unavailable for
public review.
PLEASE CONSIDER MY EXPERIENCE WHEN VOTING IN 2004.
PLEASE SEND THIS TO EVERY VOTER YOU KNOW.
PLEASE SEE TO THAT EVERYONE YOU KNOW IS REGISTERED TO
VOTE
Click here to register other voters now.
Send a 'register to vote'
email with links to online-registration sites
You can register yerself to vote ^here^ too.
Copy of ^above^ letter:
<< Dear friend, [<< but with my added inserts>>]
Did you know that only 60 percent of the voting age population in the United States actually votes?
Your Vote Matters from Working Assets offers an easy way to register
to vote, update your name and/or address on voter rolls, or change your
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You can also find out how to volunteer to help with voter registration
and get out the vote efforts in your community, and sign up to stay informed
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Just go to http://www.registrationbyworkingassets.com/friends
I hope you will join me in this effort. Together we can make a <<HUGE>> difference.
P.S. Please forward this message to anyone <<Everyone>>
that you know who might be interested.>>